Tired is the least you can say. Exhausted does not quite match it. Drained out is probably a bit closer. However, I would like to say I was completely dead for 24 hours. Pulling three all nigthers in a row does that to your body. Not only is it school load that is killing me but also work load. I really thought I could balance work and school, but shit is hard when you go above and beyond to stay on top of things. Things such as bills, bills and more bills.
This one particular day I just couldn’t get out of bed. I tried to go to the bathroom but I couldn’t. My body made it clear to my mind that I just had to put everything on hold for 24 hours. My body convinced my mind that the coming 24 hours would make me whole again and make me function as a wonder woman afterwards. My head was way too heavy to lift to check the time. First I blamed the prose workshop classes, however I found those classes entertaining despite the fact that the class starts at 8am, so I couldn’t really blame them.
Not only is the pressure coming from school and work, it is coming from friends and family. I have been receiving a lot of complaints from my loved ones. I try to stay in touch, I try to call now and then, I show that I care, but they have no clue the shit I have to go through. Not many know that I pay out-of-state tuition, that’s like $6300 a semester for 12 credits.
I don’t have the luxury like most CCNY students to live with family members and not worry about rent. Instead I live in a crappie NYC apartment that barely has any hot water and I am stuck paying $900 for one single room. Had I known that this was what I was getting myself into before moving to NYC, I would have probably had stayed in Washinton D.C.