Author Archives: Joan Infante

“I’m Gay. I just don’t like dick”

People around me know better than to take me seriously. I am the kind of guy that loves to make people laugh and gives them a reason to come to work and have fun. That fun usually revolves around my actions. I tend to do things that can be considered flamboyant. When meeting me for the first time, some people have thought of me of being a homosexual. Once they get to know me, they kind of realize that I am not… Kind of. And that is the thing, I’m gay, I just don’t like dick.

I can say that this all started around my high school years. I remember back in 2007 when I first saw ‘Brokeback Mountain.’ I absolutely loved that movie. Ang Lee did a great job and the actors, Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal, were astounding. I was afraid to watch that movie because I had a fear that my dad would walk in while the two men would go at it in the tent. I did not get turned on though. I’m not gay. Another movie that I remember around that time was ‘Not Another Gay Movie;’ hilarious movie, but very gay, nonetheless. But it contained an exaggerated, stereotypical idea of the homosexual lifestyle.

This began to surface more once my senior year of high school rolled around in 2009. Lady Gaga was an obsession of mine and I enjoyed what she did around that time. She got ruined after that year. Now she is just plain overrated and over the top. Except for her song “Judas.” That was a good song. Other kinds of music that get me excited are typical white girl songs that are played on Z100. I dare you to play Carly Rae’s “Call Me Maybe”… I dare you.

Another thing that happened senior year was my comment about Justin Bieber’s lips. I was talking to my friend and I was telling her that Bieber’s lips were small and pinkish and I doubt that it can create any satisfaction. She immediately felt the need to ask me if I was gay or bisexual. She said that she did not care if I was; she just wanted me to be honest. I denied those accusations. I know that. I’m not gay.

I loved watching the CW’s ‘Gossip Girl’ and Fox’s ‘The OC.’ I would see its new episodes every week and loved the drama that ensued. On the contrary, my friends would always try to get me to watch ABC Family’s ‘Pretty Little Liars’ because they thought that I would enjoy it. Especially because they know my taste in entertainment, but that was not the case. It may have some similar themes to ‘The OC,’ but its not like ‘The OC.’ Yet, I still could not care to be invested in the characters.

I used to constantly go to Perez Hiltons blog to get my daily dose of celebrity gossip. I only did this because there was not much to do back in the Dominican Republic. I would just use that as a way to entertain myself and kill time. Don’t get me started on Titanic. Titanic is my absolute favorite film. It was the first film I ever saw in theaters. And that is the only reason I have ever cried other than soldiers that surprised their children back home. But in that movie, I always cry in the same three parts: the moment Jack and Rose first kiss, the one where Jack draws Rose and the final scene where Rose goes to “sleep” and finds Jack waiting for her atop the grand staircase. And Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On” doesn’t help either. Making me weep like a little girl. When it came out in 3D, I went with my ex and she was the one holding me because I couldn’t contain myself. I’m not gay, I promise.

Most girls that I have hooked up with, at one time or another, have mentioned to me that they thought I was gay when they first met me. This was once brought up when the situation didn’t call for it. Just saying.

At work is when I pretty much let my gayness come out. I work at retail and I put up a front about me being gay. I have noticed, that for some reason, people take more kindly to gay people. They tend to respond positively and more easygoing when being around a gay guy. The front that I put is that I speak in a more effeminate voice and I clean up my vocabulary. I have a more welcoming presence when I am in that mode. I would always make random, stupid comments with my coworkers. One example of this is that I would say that if I were gay I would be the best boyfriend because I know what men want. Men only have one erogenous zone, unlike women. I love eating pussy though. It is too good. I’m not gay.

There is this one guy at work in which I jokingly make comments that I would try to get with him if I was gay. His name is Jay; he is such an angel and precious being. Every time I see him, I just get butterflies in my stomach. He is the perfect representation of a fictional character in all those love novels that have been written. The only thing that I hate about him is his boyfriend. But I don’t hate him because of his appearance, he looks hot, I hate him because he is with my Jay.  But I’m not gay. I promise.

Of course, all of these things that may be considered gay are really just a stereotypical interpretation of what gay men enjoy. Yes, they do love maintaining their appearance and dramatic television series, but just like heterosexuals, they don’t always fit in that category. There are many different kinds of gay; some are just more prominent than others.

I am not gay. I am just very comfortable with my sexuality. I find it so repulsive and disrespectful when men act homophobic towards gay people. They act as if every gay person that they meet wants to have sex with them. That is not the case. They are just being rude and ignorant. I am just very comfortable with my sexuality. I know I love pussy and I do not find men appealing. My friend tells me that it’s more than physical, its emotional too. My response to that was “I know, I don’t have any emotional attachment to any man. Except for Hugh Jackman. I would do him in a second.”

Dexter: The End Begins… Finally?

 

WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD!

 

 

Television shows are a tricky matter to deal with. You have to be able to attend to the needs and pleasures of your audience in order to keep the show going strong. Although not all shows can be proven a success story and last as long as ‘Seinfeld’ or ‘Friends,’ but they all have their own opportunity to leave the fans with a feeling of satisfaction and gratitude.

Having a certain time frame for a shows run allows the producers and the writers a chance to flesh out the stories and tie any loose ends that the show has created. When knowing ahead of time that a show will end, it can either be a good thing, like ‘Breaking Bad,’ in which most aficionados thought was really good and it tied up loose ends very nicely, or a not so good thing, like ‘Heroes,’ a show that had so much potential in the beginning and immediately flat lined.

Most recently, another hit TV show just went off the air, ShowTime’s ‘Dexter,’ a drama series about a blood spatter analyst for the Miami Dade Police Department that lived a secret life as a serial killer. He was taught a morality system that was referred to as “The Code,” a set of rules that his deceased father created that allows him to suppress his thirst to kill by killing people that deserve to die, such as criminals and murderers.

The eighth and final season had the tagline of “The End Begins” in all of the ads that were created. But did the final episode prove worthy enough to be in the ranks of other great shows? The problem was that one does not want to see a vigilante like Dexter have a happy ending. Even though he had a difficult life growing up, being adopted and his mother being murdered in front of him, he was still considered a villain of some sorts. This isn’t like in Bryan Singer’s ‘The Usual Suspects,’ where Kevin Spacey’s character was the mastermind behind all the deaths and robberies, and his lying and manipulation allowed him to work around the feds and escape without them even having a clue. A twist like this was possible because it was done in a way to give the audience mystery and suspense, something that no one saw coming. Dexter lived by the code, but the fact still remained that he was still a serial killer. Albeit he was doing it for the right reasons, it can be considered immoral and unethical.

Although the show had a troubling season, by introducing characters that we thought we should have cared for but were killed off an episode or two later and bringing up past characters whose story arc ended just fine. It was starting to close every part of the show, up until the final scene. After a very gratifying ending that left Dexter running head on to an upcoming tropical storm, giving the allusion that Dexter was done for and dead. They decided to pull a bait and switch and have him fake his death so that his son can live a normal life, something that he was afraid he wasn’t able to provide for him. Even though he left his son, Harrison, under the care of a wanted fugitive, Hannah McKay. Not one of his brightest moves.

One of the smartest things that the writers did with this show was how they handled the death of Dexters adoptive sister, Deb. She was also a part of the police department, first as a homicide detective then, as the show progressed, the police lieutenant. She eventually found out about her brothers secret life and that was the beginning of the downward spiral that was her life, especially since she realized that she was in love with him. She was finally starting to make amends with herself as a person, but then ultimately she was shot and taken to the hospital in critical conditions. The doctors told Dexter that her vitals looked promising but unfortunately, moments later, she was induced into a coma. All signs during the episodes leading up to the finale looked promising for the conclusion of her character, but that sudden twist was a strong emotional connection that reached out to the audience.

The final season of Dexter was a roller coaster of highs and lows, especially with an ending that left the viewers thinking to themselves “what the heck?” It had a beautiful conclusion with Dexter holding his beloved sister in his arms and then throwing her into the water, as he did with all his other “victims,” this in a way brought the show full circle. Disregarding the final scene and how they let Dexter live, he shouldn’t have deserved a happy ending, arguably enough since he put himself in a state of isolation that proved to be questionable.